Justinian C. Lane, Esq.
Let Justice Be Done, Though the Heavens May Fall

Justinian Lane's Blog

Justinian's Blog

Are These Real?

Someone sent me the following email.  2 minutes of Googling hasn't proved or disproved these lawsuits.  If anyone has proof one way or the other, do let me know.

The Anti-Stella Awards (2007)

By now, you have heard of the "Stella" awards, given each year for the most ridiculous lawsuits supposedly filed in the preceding year.

Here are a list of the crazy judges and courts – throwing out legitimate cases – and the insane reasons they gave for them. You didn’t think the craziness was always on the side of the lawsuit filers, did you?

1.    Mrs. Kenneth Bruce sued her doctor for malpractice – after all, he left a surgical clamp and three sponges inside her when he finished his operation on her in Dallas in January 2007. His defense? The patient had signed a release and waiver, promising not to sue. The problem is that Bruce never signed the release because the nurse forgot to ask her to before surgery. The Court ruled that if she had been asked, she would have signed, hence: She constructively signed. Suit thrown out. (Appeal pending.)

2.    David Richards bought a handgun in Memphis and left it sitting on his living room table. During an argument with a friend, his friend picked it up and shot him with it. Richards sued the shooter (you thought he was going to sue the gun manufacturer, didn’t you?) But a judge threw out the lawsuit in February, stating that Richards had assumed the risk of gun ownership and "everyone knows" that guns are more likely to be used against their owners and family members than anyone else.

3.    Tim Stevens went to a fast food restaurant and bought a cup of coffee for herself and large diet soda for his friend. A moment later, his friend noticed that the soft drink tasted funny. It was laced with cleaning solution. His friend sued the restaurant, but a judge in Kalamazoo threw out the case in April because, "You didn’t buy the drink from [the restaurant], it was a gift from your friend. Sue him."

4.    Todd Ryan of Atlanta came home from work this past February, just in time to see his next door neighbor chopping down the trees that ran near the property line between their houses – three feet into Ryan’s property. In all, the neighbor cut down 7 trees, all over 100 feet tall. When Ryan sued, the Judge asked him if there were "No Trespassing" or "Private Property" signs on the trees. When Ryan told him there were no such signs – on his trees or anywhere else in his subdivision – the judge threw out the case. "How was he supposed to know whose trees they were?" the judge asked.

5.    Thomas Marks of Cincinnati bought a 2007 Corvette brand new from a dealer. Shortly after purchase, he noticed the heater didn’t work. He later found out that the dealer – to repair another cooling system – had stripped the heater core and a few other parts out of this Corvette before it was sold to Marks and forgotten to replace them. When he returned to the dealer, they told him it was a "warranty" problem; GM obviously told him it was a dealer problem. When Marks sued, the Judge asked him to show in the documentation where he was promised a "heater." While Marks could point out the options he was promised, he could not point to a heater (any more than he could point to a steering wheel or a glove box) on the purchase agreement. Case dismissed.